Matt

Fri, 02 Dec 2005 01:03:17 GMT

bye.

Mon, 28 Nov 2005 11:30:37 GMT

When I've lost all hope in almost everyone...
Someone amazes me with their compassion.

Wed, 02 Nov 2005 22:05:59 GMT

Yeah so there many things I hate in this old world.

I hate how friends turn on you and how time can change friends also.
I hate how the world is obsessed with people's sexual orientation.
I hate myself for not knowing all these answers.
I hate human actions.

Has anybody noticed that we kill the most people of any country yet other countries have more guns?

....Just a thought

Life is overrated.

It Changed My Life

Wed, 19 Oct 2005 01:42:34 GMT

I had one of the best weekends since school started. I never expected it to be as good as it was. If you were responsible for making it so great, then I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I think Mr. Drye pretty much hates me. He talks to me and looks at me sometimes like I don't give a crap and lazy. The reason is probably because I forgot to write one little essay.

The concert was good and bad. The good part was most of the bands and the fact I got to see people I haven't got to see in two to three months. Thank you once again friends.

YES! A happy update from me finally.

By the way, not like you would read this but I'm sorry you wasted two weeks of my life and I'm glad I know the way you are. So stop pointing the finger when you don't know the facts.

Mon, 10 Oct 2005 23:40:18 GMT

"List seven of your favorite songs of the moment in
your journal and force seven other people to repeat this process.
Don't forget who you were tagged by!"

So, um yeah I got tagged by Erica.

My songs aren't anything special or amazing but here it goes...

1. June - Elevators Are Matchmakers
2. Bright Eyes - Something Vague
3. Bayside - Dear Tragedy
4. Silverstein - Discovering The Waterfront
5. Armor for Sleep - Slip Like Space
6. Underoath - I've Got Ten Friends and A Crowbar That says "You won't do jack"
7. June - Speak Up

I don't know anybody to tag.

1. Megan Smith
2. Jessica from Tex
3. Chelsea W.

I can't think of anymore.

Thu, 06 Oct 2005 01:29:15 GMT

I'm finding reasons to hate almost everyone.

Tue, 04 Oct 2005 23:13:21 GMT

Mr. Phillips lost his voice today so we got to talk for a whole class period.
It's weird seeing someone not being able to talk when they want to.
I think it's a pretty bad torture if you ask me.
Vocal chords, yes we need those.

I smiled all day. If it was fake or not, who cares?
Atleast, I smiled.

I'm having trouble believing a person can kill somebody in their sleep.
It just seems to be ludicrous and out there.
I feel like I'm narrow minded.
I need a bigger brain.

All We Are Is No One

Mon, 03 Oct 2005 21:22:34 GMT

I want to change so bad. I think if I was someone different, things would be so much different.

I'm not saying things would be easy, just different in a way that I don't know.

I feel like I'm failing at everything.
I also feel that everything I touch will tumble in ruins.
Am I that bad?

You will always drink to forget.

Thu, 29 Sep 2005 01:06:05 GMT

These days are really lacking something I can't place my finger on.

I feel like I'm slipping away from most of my friends. I've always believed that the 'hanging out' factor matters in a friendship or maybe I'm just wrong. Somebody enlighten me, I'd appreciate it.

A girl in my holocaust class asked me to be a slave today and pick something up. I denied her the privilege. It is weird how some people think these days. I used my mad tone when I replied with a 'no' and some more stuff. She gets under my skin and eats me alive.

A girl today during lunch said 'I'm cheap and easy' and this guy said something about me going out with her or something to that extent. I really didn't care until she said 'I'm not that cheap and easy'.

Does anybody admire someone else's feelings these days?

(I think not)

Random Thought 203403

Wed, 21 Sep 2005 02:34:11 GMT

I'm going to try to keep this one short as possible.

Yesterday, I came to the realization how horrible I've been these past few months. So, I threw my pride out the window and made up with friends that were "mad/angry/notmyfriendatthemoment". So now I have two of my friens back. Well...wait a second...one of them I never really lost, I just thought I did.

For the first time in about three years, I feel free. It's like I've had this black aura around me like Stephen King writes about around me for so long. Man, hopefully I don't die like that one guy. I probably won't so dont fret.

I love the word 'feign'. It's like the new 'fake'.
I'm a nerd for talking about words and how they excite me.

How is your life?(Yeah I really want you to answer that.)

Wed, 14 Sep 2005 02:51:29 GMT

In Soc/Psych we played the clapping game where you keep clapping until they do what you want them to. I was the target two times; one time a muscular boy thought he had to hit me and another time; this girl thought she was suppose to spray me in the face with Glade air freshener.

The rest of the day was lacking alot. I think I made a new friend in English but Mr. Phillips keeps staring at me like I killed a baby or something. I would never do that either; I probably talk too much.

I saw today that the girl that I thought showed affection to me shows it to everybody else the same. She acts like nothing happened and nothing harsh ever crossed those red lips. I know better than that. I'm still jealous but I'm more jealous I could never live up to the standards in her mind. This semester is going to be difficult sitting beside her for almost two hours.

Romeo is bleeding to death.

Fri, 02 Sep 2005 00:47:10 GMT

I almost made a girl cry today.
I looked into her eyes and saw the pain I caused her in just an hour.
That showed me how horrible I am at times.

For this whole week, I've been pushing the horrible events that surround Hurricane Katrina far away from my mind.

It all became clear today and I feel so helpless and selfish.
I would trade myself for all thoses people.

I stared at my phone for over an hour afraid to call someone.
That's my life.

Summer Ends and the Leaves fall

Wed, 24 Aug 2005 07:02:03 GMT

So after a long three months of sun and late nights with friends, the summertime is finally over. I never would have thought I would do some of the things that this summer has brought me. I guess you could look at that as more bad than good. I've changed and sometimes I scare myself.

School starts tomorrow and I have mixed feelings. For some reason, I love the feeling of learning and have work to do. It's just I don't want the people around that are around at times. I think every year it's gonna be different, that maybe people have matured but they never do.

I never mature anyways so it's partially my fault.

One more year and I get to live a new life with lectures and romance. Oh boy!

It was The Neverending Story meets A Wrinkle in Time

Wed, 17 Aug 2005 16:40:09 GMT

I had one of those reality dreams last night.

It was the kind of dream that was so real that it seemed like I was there but then I woke up and felt kinda sad and relieved at the same time.

Now I'm afraid to see the person that was in my dream.

For some reason, I think the dream will come true and well it wasn't such a great dream.

But dreams or nightmares are the brain's way of making us deal with the stuff we don't want to deal with.

It just caught up to me now.

The 20th Century Was Entirely Mine

Fri, 12 Aug 2005 06:08:40 GMT

So let's recap my week :

Monday I went to the ghetto fabolous Warped Tour.
The bands were great but the fans were dickheads.

And I have been recovering the rest of the week.
Can somebody say "I'm not going next year"?

Some of my friendships are hanging on for dear life.
Sometimes I just consider them acquitances instead of friends.
I'll always say 'hey' but that is where it really stops.

I want to be perfect and be liked by everyone around me.
But global warming fucks it all up.

Goodnight.

Leonardo Da Vinci was a genius but nobody knows it.

Mon, 01 Aug 2005 07:34:48 GMT

EDIT: Ignore the last post entirely.

Anyway, I don't get why people feel the need to get trashed on the weekends to be complete. It just makes no sense at all. I assume that drinking or drugs is somebody's vice in life but I guess that is just not me.

I'm not pointing the finger because I don't have that power.

It's just my general thought but there will be a fight about it for sure.

The summer seems to never end and yet I want school back, I feel a longing to do nothing for the rest of the year.

I'm so worried about alot of things.
Like being in college a year from now.
I don't seem mature enough to be there or here for that matter.

This post was pointless.

Fri, 29 Jul 2005 05:25:59 GMT

I'm leaving this journal crazyness for good. So whatever.

Wed, 04 May 2005 02:19:30 GMT

I want someone near and dear to talk to on the telephone.

Just anyone at all that won't care when I call and will always be happy to talk.

This is what I need for life to be complete.

Fri, 15 Apr 2005 20:31:52 GMT

Life is good.

A more offical update later today sometime.

♥
Matt

Ten Different Ways To Enjoy This Night

Wed, 02 Feb 2005 03:59:48 GMT

Well...alot has happened since the last time I updated this heart-felt journal of mine. I don't know where to start. Well anyway, Friday I went to the SoCO/Straylight Run concert. It was very excellent and I find it amazing that I am fortunate to go to stuff like that. I'm not sure which band I liked most but if I had to choose, it would be Straylight Run. They are so excellent live and they played my favorite song.

Right now, I'm not sure how I feel about alot of things. I'm wanting to write the most perfect entry that will make everybody read it but I always fall short. I guess I'm never good with words. I don't like the fact that relationships is the sole thing that matters in High School nowadays. I mean yeah it's all good but if that is what we are suppose to have, then I am left with nothing.

How does it feel to be on the receiving end of this one?

Tue, 25 Jan 2005 03:36:23 GMT

I feel so alive.

I've noticed that when I have a good day, everybody else has a bad one.

So, I feel bad for feeling good.

I can't wait for Friday. It's killing me. It will probably be the best concert ever. I have to call so many people. It will be cool though. It gives me an excuse to use my phone.

That's all for today, kiddos.

Love you like the waterfalls.

I'm a classic disaster.

Tue, 18 Jan 2005 20:58:46 GMT

I love my life.

Let me repeat that.

I love my life.

Well anyway, you could tell something good happened today. I should leave it up to you to make up your own little reasons. It's more divertido(fun) that way.

Lately, people have noticed how happy I am.

I'm glad that people notice that and I guess you could say I'm just enjoying life to it's greatest extent. I like mingling with the friends during the day and everyday seems like the best day.

Enough rambling?

Thought so.

Love you.

You say that you want respect.

Wed, 12 Jan 2005 21:45:02 GMT

I feel like nothing else.

It seems to me that everything truly takes time. Everybody around me seems to be happy but I guess that like reflects on me in a way. I'm so glad that my period of feeling lonely is gone. I always thought I was suppose to be alone but not that at all. I need to embrace the people I can stand.

Today was a good day. I saw the people I like to see and I'm getting use to this semester. I've also found out that I am a likeable guy. My humor is supposely my best quality.

I hope this feeling continues.

My knuckles have turned to white.

Tue, 04 Jan 2005 21:12:55 GMT

Today was the first day back after winter break. It's quite annoying reviewing rules that are the same in every class. Repetition hints signs of boredom and I hate it.

I think I was crazy when I signed up for Spanish IV. I mean, I feel so out of place in that class. I want to drop out but I also want to succeed in it. I really don't know what I want. I think I'll stick through with Spanish IV.

Last semester, I had always envyed of having first lunch so I could sit with certain people and eat. Now that card has been dealt and I find myself fitting in with a different crowd. It feels good to wanted somewhere. I truly know what friends are all about.

I'm actually looking forward to school everyday now. It seems sad but it's my life. I've actually realized that now.

"My knuckles have turned to white
There's no turning back tonight
Kiss me one last time
Shut Your Eyes"

Where has all the bastards gone?

Fri, 31 Dec 2004 00:22:07 GMT

1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. How have I affected you?
5. What do you think of me?
6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?
7. How long do you think we will be friends?
8. Do you love me?
9. Do you have a crush on me?
10. Would you kiss me?
11. Would you hug me?
12. Physically, what stands out?
13. Emotionally, what stands out?
14. Do you wish I was cooler?
15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?
16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
17. Am I loveable?
18. How long have you known me?
19. Describe me in one word.
20. What was your first impression?
21. Do you still think that way about me now?
22. What do you think my weakness is?
23. Do you think I'll get married?
24. What makes me happy?
25. What makes me sad?
26. What reminds you of me?
27. If you could give me anything what would it be?
28. How well do you know me?
29. When's the last time you saw me?
30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
31. Do you think I could kill someone?
32. Have we ever had sex?
33. Do you want to have sex with me?
34. Do you miss me?
35. Do you think i miss you?
36. Are you going to put this on your livejournal and see what I say about you?